Injured Entertainer, Yet Parent Demands Hello Kitty

Dale-Eye-PatchIn the midst of entertaining, a balloon explodes, allowing the outstretched remains to hurl itself back at light speed and striking with military precision the open eye of the entertainer. I have had this happen and it is an amusement ride of terror that you just cannot wait to get off.

Being a professional entertainer, he endures the pain and finishes those last three children, explaining that because of the accident he will not be able accommodate their requests, but will ensure they get a balloon figure.

Later that evening, an email message is received from the father of the three girls. He is angered that his girls did not get the Hello Kitty they wanted, and in retaliation is calling the restaurant and complaining, and will not recommend his balloon service to the HR department of the Fortune 500 company that employs him and his wife.

This was a true story told at a balloon group’s support group. I am happy to report the entertainer is OK and the restaurant fully understood his injury and was willing to stand by him.

It is common to hear stories of people’s greed, pity requests, and see how they value their satisfaction of others. Yet, if only you could fire off an email response, mine would go like this.

 Dear Sir

I feel your pain. As I wait here in the emergency room, with blood dripping from my eye, I can only imagine the wait you endured in my balloon line. I apologize for this. No parent should have to wait for a balloon. It is insensitive and I apologize again.

As I sit here waiting for medical attention to have the embedded balloon fragments removed from my eye, I will twist three Hello Kitties for your daughters.

I will talk with medical staff to see if they will allow me to leave the Hello Kitty outside the operating room. It may be that eye surgery is required, but don’t worry, my hands are uncramping now and I can twist balloons again.

Lastly, please do not worry about the blood on the balloons. My skill level prevents me from twisting Hello Kitty’s with one hand, so I must use the hand that is pressed against my injured eye. I have no blood related diseases, but I will ask the emergency nurses to wipe down the balloon with an alcohol rub prior to your coming. The emergency nurses seem nice and in between emergency medical calls are just dispensing drugs, reading charts, and talking with doctors, so I’m sure they have plenty of time to sterilize the Hello Kitty balloons for your daughters.

Sent from my Android phone with K-9 Mail. Please excuse my brevity.

1 thought on “Injured Entertainer, Yet Parent Demands Hello Kitty”

  1. Years ago I had a 260 snap back and hit me in the eye. It hit so hard that it took a sliver out of my hard contact lens. Boy was I grateful I’d had that lens to protect my eye! Fortunately I had a nicer ending: my promoter (I was advance clown for Circus Vargas at the time) escorted me from the venue and told people the clown wouldn’t be making any more balloons.

    Yes, I still inflate by mouth much of the time, but I usually squint to protect my eyes. People wonder why I don’t use the pump standing right there beside me, but mouth inflating is just so much easier and more efficient sometimes.

    Maybe we should send emails like the one you proposed. Dr. Phil got famous and got a television show by being the outrageous therapist. Could it work for balloon twisters too?

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